over50feeling40: The Similarity Between Style and Public Speaking
Fashion and Lifestyle Blog for women over 50 to help achieve strength, confidence, joy, inspiration, and, of course, head-turning personal style!

Jun 12, 2011

The Similarity Between Style and Public Speaking

Effortless style is what I am going for
this busy, busy week! The cardigan
is very Stien Mart.

I start teaching summer school this week…that’s right on top of final wedding preparations, I will also be teaching high school students how to speak!! I am a glutton for punishment!

Almost every day, I have to quickly leave class and go run a wedding errand. The week is very scheduled with what must be done on which day! Praise God, I have a wedding planner and she is amazing and a lifesaver. I do not think I could have done this alone!

Confidence is a main ingrediant for
successful public speaking and style!

I love teaching summer school speech! I believe strongly that proper speaking skills can lead to success across many venues. I was grieved when I went to the blogger’s conference in Austin last spring to hear almost every speaker begin with an apology….I am not a good speaker….were the first words out of several mouths. These beautiful, accomplished young ladies who have so much going for them began with an apology about their communication skills. That should NEVER happen!! I really hope to change things like that one speaker at a time!!  And, yes, I am passionate about it!

 My style is more along the lines of the Dale Carnegie type of speaking…conversational (not canned) speech! Dale Carnegie wrote, “The man who writes out and memorizes his talks is wasting his time and energy, and courting disaster. All our lives we have been speaking spontaneously. We haven’t been thinking of the words. We have been thinking of ideas. If our ideas are clear, the words come as naturally and unconsciously as the air we breathe.”
Public speaking and style are similar in the sense that you really have the snap of your fingers to get someone's attention!  How you look and the first words out of your mouth are very important...especially in the business world!!

The necklace is Chico's...bracelets are from
various places!  I like to mix them up!

I always tell them, I am teaching you to speak….not read!
Are there any of you out there who would like to offer your suggestions for successful public speaking??

Wanted!  That's the brand of these gold flats
from Marshall's


  1. I love this post- I can relate- I really get bummed that women start out with apologies. I don't. By nature I am a good public speaker- not sure why, I'm not trained (except for one college class) and I think I do well is like you, I aim for a conversation. I found that when I focus more on actually connecting with the audience (someone specific if need by) I become relaxed and therefore can focus on my message. After all the reason why I am talking to a group of people is because I have something to say- so I pay more attention in being true to my message than being self conscious. It's about our message not how we look in front.

  2. I agree that its all about the message and whether or not you feel enough passion in presenting it to get over the hump.

    I have run for public office a few times. That is one certain way to force yourself into overcoming the fear of speaking. The last time I ran for office, I had joined up with an 84 year old man who had decades of experience in public speaking. He was an international sales person for several companies and decided to help me. He tried so hard to help me script things and practice my scripts. And I struggled and faltered which really worried him. At one of my last speeches of the campaign, he pulled me aside just before I went on and said, "Just be yourself." I said, "What? What do you think I should say then? I don't understand.", and he replied, "Just be yourself. You're funny, just let them see you." And I remember that speech well because I really enjoyed it. It was a tense situation with me seated next to the very proper and wealthy male incumbent, but I was not nervous. And I related well with the audience who were sitting through their 6th speech of the evening.

    Now, I didn't win the election - let's get real here! But I learned that I can speak and be a messenger for many who are unable to speak out for themselves. And 7,000 people did vote for me.

  3. Kitty - great for you! It takes a lot of guts to run for office.

    Pam, you have a very important job, because this is a vital skill for teens to learn. I took a few lessons from a pro when I was in my 40's and it helped so much.

  4. I think you are right about most people being frightened of public speaking. while i'm generally a pretty quite person, and often have difficultly staring up conversations, I don't have a problem with public speaking. I suppose it's because it's about something specific, and I know what i want to say - so I don't struggle the way I do when it comes to things like making small talk with strangers (something i'm always trying to avoid).

    Chic on the Cheap

  5. Pam~would love to hear some more of your tips on public speaking! Eventhough I am outgoing, I am uncomfortable and very nervous if I have to speak in front of 5 people or 500. I would be one of those apologizing women, I'm afraid~Good luck with your schedule. It seems gruelling, but all for good things. :~)

  6. Pam--First let me say that you are looking beautiful! The long blue sweater just looks great on you. I still get a bit nervous about public speaking, but unlike our administrators, I do tend to "wing" my speeches. Unusually, I am always very nervous for the first two weeks of a semester, until my students and I grow a bit comfortable with each other.

  7. Great post! You are right you can tell when someone is reading verbatim and if someone is speaking from their heart during a speech. The person speaking from their heart grabs your attention much more. I never thought of that before.

  8. i hated speech in high school! guess because our peers (seem to be) more critical?? but i don't mind skeaking now. i do believe that if you know what you are talking about, it's easy to get up and talk. most of my speeches in college were about subjects that i was unfamiliar with, so i was one who wrote out my speeches! you are looking good, pam! love that starfish!


  9. I don't know anything about public speaking...I avoid it at all costs...in school I'd lie and say I hadn't read the book if an oral report was expected. I have issues with writing...or phone messages. I think no matter how 'hip' or young you are you should have a decent message for your voice mail or answering machine. Hey, a potential employer might be calling. And I hate all the 'abbreviations' used in IM or email. Guess that is how things change...but plz dont leve me a msg ... cuz i mite b l8t.

  10. I absolutely hate when someone prefaces what they're about to say with an apology. For years, the managers that I worked under would begin their meetings with some sort of apology that immediately gave their audience the impression that they did not own their subject.

    Thank you for visiting us at The Big Block House. Following you.


  11. You're a very busy lady, Pam...enjoy summer school and thank you for popping by and leaving your lovely comments.

  12. Pam,
    I used to be so scared to speak in front of others, even in classrooms, I would literally shake! I had a wonderful boss who pushed me to do presentations and teach some classes. As a result of speaking a number of times in front of small and large audiences, I became much more relaxed and able to speak easily.
    My biggest pet peeve is people who say "uh", "like", and "you know". I once counted 100+ "uh's" in one persons presentation. That was in the first few minutes. I finally had to ignore the speaker.
    I guess the bottom line is to just do it.

  13. I'm so glad to hear that speech is taught in America even in high school. I am not aware of such subject in Georgia. I had to take speech for the first time here, in the States.
    Also, I once "had" to speak in front of about a thousand people in college. I was a newcomer then, and my English was not that good.. I thought I would faint, but I did it. I was asked to talk about Georgia and I just could not refuse since it was for the country ;) lol My knees and hands were shaking like crazy.

  14. well, hello skinny minnie!!
    you are looking fab and i hope your rib is healing well
    lovely post today
    i am thankful, that i don't have a problem speaking in public, heck i might have the opposite problem lol

  15. I used to be much better about public speaking and probably need to get back into that arena sometime soon. Cantoring at church offers some of the same challenges, though.

    Thanks for popping by my blog this past week and following.

    BTW ~ you look fabulous!!

    Laura O in AK


Thanks so much for joining in our conversation today! I appreciate your time and love hearing from you!