over50feeling40: Help Me Talk Teen-Talk!!
Fashion and Lifestyle Blog for women over 50 to help achieve strength, confidence, joy, inspiration, and, of course, head-turning personal style!

May 30, 2011

Help Me Talk Teen-Talk!!

It is officially the beginning of summer….at least that is the way a school teacher thinks! While there is much going on in my private life this summer, I have also set goals for my professional life. I am a goal setter…trained by the business world to be that way.

I have a list of goals for this blog, but also a list for my life as a high school teacher. One of those goals is to work alongside one of the younger, trendy teachers to create an assembly for teenage girls about the messages they send with their clothing and on social media. One of the greatest challenges working with teens today is often their real lives and their online lives are completely different. It breaks our hearts to see how their low self- esteem is literally guiding some to market themselves sexually on a Face Book page.

So, I would love to ask you…the wisdom of the blogosphere…what you would say to teens about their choices for dress and for social media messages. What are some things we can communicate to them that might catch their attention??

Cardi, Earrings, Bracelet: Stein Mart
Cami: Chico's, Travelers
Skirt: Lane Bryant
Shoes: Payless

A NOTE ABOUT YESTERDAY’S POST: First, Paula at Fashion Over Fifty  rocks a mini-skirt better than most women I know! I admire her for it and do not judge her for it….I hope no one read judgment into that post. I have set guidelines for ME….the Pam guidelines of style are completely different from YOUR guidelines. The post came from researching what others say about our age group. As a reporter, I plan to put out the information and let you discuss it. Mini-skirts are not in my wardrobe goals, but for those of you who love them and wear them, I applaud you. The blog began almost a year ago with MY journey and how I process this thing called STYLE….but as Judith so simply wrote, "Love that we make our own rules.” Our own discernment tells us what is best for us. I love all of you who love the mini-skirt and hope you did not read a different message there!

Now, what would you say to the teens??


  1. The way that you represent yourself on your Facebook page (or other social networking sites) serves as a first impression when someone takes a look at your profile, including potential future employers. Here are a few tips to consider as you navigate these social media sites:

    1 You don’t have to reveal more personal information than is necessary. Your name, school and employer are basic info, but you can keep your birth date, current address and phone number to yourself.

    2 Think before you type… If you wouldn’t normally say something out loud in a crowded classroom or cafeteria, then you probably shouldn’t post it online.

    3 Post pictures with caution. Once a photo is uploaded it can easily be tagged, copied and reposted elsewhere on the internet. Be sure to consider the potential repercussions that might result if a family member, coworker, or employer were to see a photograph of you in a compromising situation. Let friends know not to post those kinds of pictures of you either. Remember, just because you didn’t post it, doesn’t mean it’s not there.

    4 When choosing your profile picture or posting photos to your page, keep it professional or at least neutral. Don’t post pictures that are provocative, risky, or inappropriate.

    5 Express yourself. Use your bio and wall posts as an opportunity to highlight your marketable strengths. Post content, links, and news to showcase your personal interests and professional areas of expertise.

    6 There is such a thing as too much information!

    7 Avoid having public arguments on a social media website.

    8 Never bad mouth previous employers, co-workers, or clients.

    9 Remember that employers can be using your social networking profiles as a type of background check for potential employees. Your profiles, photos, and status updates can reveal a lot about you.

    10 Trying to balance work and friends on social networks? Try keeping them separate. A professional network such as LinkedIn may be best to connect with work colleagues, potential employers, and professional connections. Save your twitter and Facebook accounts for your more casual friends (just be careful of what you share!!)

    Remember, most networks, including Facebook, offer privacy settings to alter what information can be viewed by other people. Take advantage of these settings, change your privacy settings to best suit you and your networking needs.

    Souce: MBCC website

  2. Also put you on my blog roll


  3. Love your sweater. I have 2 teens... a son 18, and a daughter 15. I agree that society is raising our kids and that parents need to do a lot more talking w/ their kids beginning at an early age. What I have found in our community that is disheartening is that the majority of the high school kids do not consider "weed a drug" or "oral sex to be sex." Beyond disturbing. I don't think kids are really thinking about what they are posting on Facebook or how something can come back to bite them in the butt. I do think parents should monitor their kids Facebook if they are under a certain age but morals and values begin at home. You are obviously, a very caring teacher and one who wants to make a real difference in your student's lives. xo

  4. I'm the same as Debby, a son 18, and a daughter 15. I think both understand the importance of not putting something out there that could permanently affect their reputations. Their school district has a standardized dress code, polos and khakis. Outside of school my daughter dresses pretty modestly, no shorts that don't still cover her rear when she bends over, no low cut or backless tops, nothing shows that shouldn't show. There are plenty of readily available fashions out there that don't say "I'm a slut".

  5. Ummm.... what an interesting and thought-provoking post. I would never let my daughter go anywhere near any slutty gear. But whilst on holiday this year, I did see an 8 year old wearing a t-shirt with 'Sexy Bitch' emblazoned over the front. It made me feel sick! I am a Victorian parent ;-)

  6. I had boys so I am not qualified to comment about girls.

    However, I think stressing that just because someone puts something trashy on their Facebook page it does not mean they are trashy.

    Remember the picture in the War room when they took out Bin Laden? I read that some crazy newspaper airbrushed Mrs. Clinton out because they thought she was suggestive. I didn't see what was all that suggestive about her pose, but someone else did.

    We shouldn't rush to judgement based on things we see.

  7. Wow, J pretty much covered it! I applaud you on your plans. Definately encourage the girls to go home and pretend they are a potential college or employer and google themselves to see what comes up.

    Also Pam dear on your twitter profile, may I suggest adding your blog url to your bio. I think you'll find doing so will up your traffic from twitter. Much love! ;)

  8. This is such a great idea, Pam. I think the hard part is presenting it so that they buy in. Trying not to comment on the fashion of their time. Or judge that. Just talking about image and perception. Stick to that and I think they will be able to hear you.

    PS: You were right about Paula. She rocks a mini.


  9. I also had boys so it would be hard to comment on the teenage girl thing--altho there is so much to say! So glad to hear you are taking charge--good luck!

    And as I said in my email, your post of yesterday was not interpreted, by me anyway, to be judgemental in any way. You've always been so supportive of my blog and hey, GF, we are in this together! Love Paula

  10. What to say to teens.. that is a hard one because look around - whew - it's tough nowadays.
    The Kardashian's are heroes. I don't get it... on and on it goes.
    And you know what ... I laughed about the manager not picking up the lunch. Because that would grind me more than the medical bills! hahhahah! Agree! I am so against those types of law suits too!
    But... You have every right to whine!!!!!!!!!! ( :
    Hope you are feeling better -have you gotten the sign yet from the broken rib? hehe!
    Have a pretty day

  11. No advice on the teen front... being just grateful that I'm not among them.
    But, I will compliment your skirt! I LOVE it. The print, shape, colors!

  12. I am 25 and I guess I would say to them that what they wear can represent themselves..In a good way or a bad way..and that they should always respect themselves and not give off the wrong impression because They are truly worth so much more than that~ Good luck with this..I think its a wonderful thing what your doing by the way


  13. I am a new follower from the blog hop...



Thanks so much for joining in our conversation today! I appreciate your time and love hearing from you!